Improvement

Starting Weight: 256
Current Weight: 255
Total Loss: 1 lb

Ok...I gained this week...but I know why! I decided after writing my last post that I needed to focus on the "sneaking" and try and overcome it. I can't say that I was 100% successful, but I can say that I tracked and logged EVERY thing I put into my mouth. I used up all of my daily points, and all of my weekly allowance points, but I felt so good because I admitted my actions to myself and to WW.

I may have gained, but this step was crucial to my journey, and I feel incredibly empowered by it. Once I saw the numbers on the scale at weigh in, I immediately knew I needed to make changes in my behavior. I have started implementing them and we will see what happens next week.

Some things I have done to balance my diet are:

• Eat a salad with my dinner so I don't eat too much of the main course where the points are high.
• If I know I am gong to splurge at some point in the day, I organize my other meals accordingly.
• Plan out my meals the night before so I know that if I eat exactly what I planned my points will be gone so there is no room for unnecessary snacking.
  

• Weigh myself half way through the week so that I can get a feel for where I am at, and know if I need to adjust.

Although I gained, I will take it. It is just another step on this road to a healthier me.

wanted to let you all know that I appreciate your support so much. It really helps to know that you are listening and cheering me on. Love you guys. :)

Secrets. And a little loss.

Starting Weight: 256
Current Weight: 253
Total Loss: 3 lbs

First of all, I lost 2 pounds this week. I am pretty happy with that, but I will admit most of it is because I was sick so I didn't eat much. Let me tell you, my hunger has come back with a vengeance! It's like I can't get enough food.. and I don't like it.

Second of all, I have realized something horrible about myself that I must get under control: I am a sneak eater. I will sneak food because I don't want anyone to judge me for it...but it isn't healthy food, and it isn't healthy for me to feel that I need to do that in the first place. Some examples of this unhealthy behavior are: stopping at McDonald's on the way home and eating it in the parking lot, opening a bag of chocolate chips and eating small handfuls throughout the day while hiding the bag in the cupboard so Eli won't see, baking for my "co-workers" but eating half the batch before I take them, buying a box of hostess and eating half of it on my lunch break in the car and throwing the rest away so Eli won't see....notice a pattern? It's always eating unhealthy things and sneaking them so my husband won't find out...but let me tell you, the scale doesn't keep my secret.

I am sure some of you are reading this and thinking that I am a disgusting person...but I am also sure that some of you are feeling relieved, because you secretly do this too. I don't think it is as uncommon as we may believe for people to feel like they want to indulge in private...if a tree falls in the woods and no one hears it, does it really make a sound? Same concept goes for this situation...if no one sees me eat it, did I really indulge?

Long story short...I want to get rid of his behavior...it is not healthy mentally or physically. I have once again been reading up on my trusty WW blogging community, and I have found a success story that I can really relate too. A woman started WW with this same addiction, and overcame it by stopping and thinking why she wanted to indulge every time the urge came to sneak. She found that it helped her address emotional issues in her life, while improving her results on the scale.

My goal for this week is to do just that, stop in my tracks and really think through what is causing me to want to eat those chips at 2 am while Eli is asleep. I hope I can come back next week with some positive feedback.

I love that this blog is becoming so much more than a weight tracker. I need an outlet, and I'm glad you all stop in to listen. :)